Following Wednesday's date (scenario 2, for anyone who didn't immediately guess), I became that girl.
You know, the one you have two nice evenings with. The one you take to the cinema, then to dinner, walk to the tube and even get a little peck on the lips. The one who's all "Thaaaanks, I had a lovely night" at the end of it.
The girl who, after all that, doesn't text back.
Mostly because she's out gallavanting. She's at a birthday, before hopping in a cab across London to a houseparty. She's bumping into old friends, and spurning the advances of new ones when they decide to share a bed with her that night.
"Oi. Top to tail, I said. We're not snuggling. Sod off." she growls, before thwacking away a leg, placing herself at the opposite end of the bed and falling asleep.
Then she's making her way home at 10am the next morning in last night's clothes, chilling out, then heading back out to play elsewhere. Sunday is a day of rest, followed by a night of drinks, dancing and epic music.
Then it's Monday, holiday. Then it's Tuesday, work.
What can she say?
She could reply to the text, but it would only be with:
a) the truth
which is also
b) a horrible cliche.
Something along the lines of
c) "It's not you, it's me"
and the kicker,
d) "Sorry, I'm just not over my ex".
In short, being single is good.
And sometimes, silence is the lesser evil.
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10 comments:
That's a dilemma. You could just ignore him, but that's sort of mean. I guess just be honest. :/
Having been on the other end of the silence, many a time, I think it's kinder just to 'fess up. I'm sure he'd rather know.
Silence will eventually drive the message home ... but I'd favour the texting option (and the `not got past ex' reason is perfect).
Ignoring him 'til he goes away works, until one day you bump into him. Cue awkward small talk and making up excuses about losing your phone & his number with it (can you tell I've been there?).
Have you heard from him again since? I'd tell him by text, but definitely wouldn't mention anything about the ex, maybe just say you're not ready for this.
You're going to have to make contact, I'm afraid.
And you're not THAT GIRL, because THAT GIRL uses it as an excuse. Here, it's the reason. x
Got to agree with everyone else. Silence is not the lesser evil.
How about a "Dear [NAME], We regret to inform you that you have not been successful in attaining the position which you seek. We wish you the very best in your future endeavours.
Yours sincerely,
It works for employers all the time. Why not dates?
I'd text something short but sweet without offering any real explantion, simply that you're not interested in pursuing anything further. The silence is agonizing on the other end.
Dear Blah Chap,
you were a shit date. Sorry, better luck next time.
Yours,
J
Brutal, to the point, and he won't be left wondering why!
I have to say I'm with the General. A chap needs to know where he stands; we are but simple creatures, tell us like it is!
I think this is one of those situations where because it's my life type thing, I kind of know best.
And coming out with all this ex boyfriend / "I'm not ready" blurb when the idea or suggestion of a relationship or potential anything hasn't even been uttered...like we've just met up twice and chatted about nothing more personal than how busy work was today...well, it seems a bit forthright and presumtious. A bit "woah there darling! Chill out!".
But I take where you're all coming from. And if there ever had been talk of things progressing, or a hint of flirtation on my behalf, or anything more than awkward-ish getting to know you type conversation, a promise of something more from me, ever, then maybe I'd wing in there with an apologetic text.
But there hasn't been, really. So I'm not sure I've got anything to say.
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