Tuesday, 15 March 2011

What do you do when plans fall through?

Tricky, this old "sort your life out" business, init?

You go travelling with the aim of doing just that, then come home and make plans.

First up, get a job. Next, find a flat. Finally, move in. Relax for a bit. Enjoy doing what you and your Boyfriend spent months wistfully imagining while creeping around your parents house every weekend. Like drinking wine on a school night and leaving your dishes by the sink. All that.

The next few years are mapped out before you. After a year or two of London, you'll both apply for an Australian visa. He can get one easily and after two years living together, so can you. Jobs will be acquired and you'll travel again like last time before you eventually settle, with a cat called MagicCat (all one word) and a dog with pointy ears like a fox.

Before any of that can happen, the boyfriend drops a bomb on it all. Life goes pop and within a month, your flat and all those nice plans are gone. Instead of a fox dog, you're back at your parent's house calling home before dinner, tidying your room and mending your head, aided by labradors.

Life is wide open again. You could search for a house share. Or you could search for a job; you'll be doing that in 4 months anyway. You're not quite ready to search for a man, so instead, you search for a plan.

And sometimes, when all your past ones have crashed a little bit, that's just not a very easy thing to do.


Blonde said...

I think searching for a job and a house counts as a plan, somehow, my love. x

Anonymous said...

I'm in the same position, except I've already lost my job. I feel angry and lost. I hope things pick up for us both x

Please Don't Eat With Your Mouth Open said...

Blonde - I suppose I just don't feel like I know which order to do it all in. Simultaneously? Stay at home and save while searching for a job? Find a flat and deal with the job situation as it happens? Bah. Kerfuffle. Feel very un-sorted.

Anon - Oh, ouch. I feel your pain, although by already losing your job you do have the bad cards especially. Things can only get better, yes? (allegedly)

jman said...

As John Lennon once sang, "Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans." Did I miss something? Is your job just a contract one? Since I started with a quote I feel symmetry demands I end with one - as the producer I believe, at least someone in Shakespeare in Love kept saying "It will come right on the night." And I have no doubt your night will come.

Elaine said...

I think you should pretend you never met him. (I know that's easier said than done.)

What would you have done if you'd gone travelling alone and come back alone? What would have been your priority?

Don't let HIM become an obstacle. Step right over him and follow your dreams. x

Anonymous said...

I didn't realise your were on a contract at the place we are not allowed to ask prying questions about.

You've previously mentioned that you were ready to leave home. So maybe you should take a chance that you'll find a job quickly (you always seem to do so) and move out as the first step?

Please Don't Eat With Your Mouth Open said...

jman - Ah, I may not have mentioned it. I will update in another post. But yes, good quotes. If the big man himself said it, it must be true.

Elaine - Sterling advice. It's strange how much, despite the plans, he hasn't impacted on my life. He is surprisingly easily forgotten, himself. Just the plans remain. But like you say, onwards as if it's always been just me.

Perp - That was going to be my original course of action, but you know when people panic around you and it makes you panic? Ah, I'll blog about it and explain better.


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