Friday, 14 August 2009

Saying HELLO

Last night people whose blogs I read, or swap 140 character messages with on twitter, were meeting up for a drinkie poo in London. For (get this) h'actual face to face conversation. Like talking...with mouths and stuff. Mental.

Fact is, I did actually consider going along to the little meet up. I was literally very close; walked past it on my way to Oxford Street. Considered going in. But ultimately, I decided not to. Now, don't be offended. This isn't because I think you're all subhuman lumps of cow pat. It's not because I'm shy, scared, anti-social, or adverse to meeting people off the internet. I'm actually very curious to know what fellow bloggers look like, how my impression of them matches up with the real deal. But conversely, I think that's also why I didn't go in.

One thing is the whole anonymity aspect. It's the mystery of blogging. You don't know me - not really - and I don't know you. For one, this makes it easy for me to write about certain things, and not just the personal stuff. Let me give you a very hypothetical example. Say I write a post about...I don't know, people with wonky eyes. Not in a nasty mocking way, just an observational one that asks "where are they looking?". Like if someone starts talking to you but one eye's at the ceiling and the other slightly to your left, I'm never sure quite where to look, or whether they're looking at me. Or even talking to me in the first place, come to that. Often there's a delay in my response, especially if I'm standing next to someone else, like oh! Me?

Standard blog post idea, yes? Wouldn't think twice about asking you all what you reckon, might even get some first hand accounts coming in so I can lay the issue to rest once and for all. But say I met you all at a big group meeting and one of you had a wonky eye, then no matter how much the subject of wonky eyes plagues me, I probably wouldn't write that post the next day. I'd be worried about causing offence, because I'd have met you and you read this blog. In turn, you might worry that next time I saw you I'd be concentrating on your wonky eye. Facial features aside, limiting the blog fodder is just one reason out of a few. For instance, some bloggers I'd have no issues giving my real name to, wouldn't care if you knew where I worked or lived. Some of you already do. Others, I don't know or communicate with outside of the odd blog comment or twitter, and would want to be more careful. How do you make that distinction when you're all sitting round a table together?

Sure, a one-on-one here and there, a hand picked rendezvous, I'm down for that. Some of you I'd love to have a good old chin wag with, particularly those on the old Blogroll. I think we'd get on really well. But I like the mystery of the wider blogging experience. Meeting those whose blogs I don't follow, who I don't feel I "know", doesn't really appeal.

Plus, in my mind, you are all imp-like mythical creatures with fairy wings and sparkly noses. Some of you have hooves. One of you resembles a fawn. Isn't that a wonderful thing?


Mouldy-Old-Tartlet said...



No, I can completely understand where you're coming from. That's why I've never EVER attended a blogging meet or a forum meet. And never EVER intend to.


Time Traveller said...

Shame. I was being nosey and wanted to know what you looked like :)

Mjohnson said...

I’m a 12 year old boy with ADHD and facial spasmodia.

arbyn said...

Don't want to spoil the mystery. It's kind of neat--good willpower!

Brennig said...

I said I'd go - it's no biggie, I've met a few of last night's gang before and met several other bloggers over the years - but owing to circumstances completely beyond my control, I couldn't be in two places at the same time.


But I do understand what you mean though.

Blue soup said...

I do understand what you mean. I didn't meet another blogger for a long time and at first I only met on a one-to-one basis. I think I would be wary of a large gathering in general too, but I had met most of last night's bunch before at some point. I do think that groups that are too big can be too hard to manage though.

And Ben "I couldn't be in two places at the same time." What? Nonsense. x

All Mod Cons said...

I've met a few bloggers, mainly Canadians. They've all been really cool and I wasn't tempted to murder any of them. Not even once.

Anonymous said...

To be fair, we only wanted to check out your 'wonky' shoulder! ;)

Please Don't Eat With Your Mouth Open said...

MOT - Speaking of bloggers, where the hell has yours gone?

Timetraveller - Good to know it wasn't my sparkling conversation you wanted!

Mjohnson - Oh, I'd just mock you openly in that case. Wicked. See you next week?

Arbyn - I'm a strong willed kinda girl.

Brennig - Valid excuse I reckon. There'll be others i'm sure.

Blue - Yeah, that's the thing, I would have quite liked to meet a couple of you. Just not everyone all at the same time. Too complicated. Not good at avoiding questions I don't want to answer, that sort of thing.

All Mod - That's reasurring. Good willpower on show there.

Perp - My wonky shoulder is only half of my appeal, fact. (you're just jealous)

Elaine said...

I've met 4 so far; not all at once though. I could never go to a convention or fact meeting just ONE gave me a panic attack for about three weeks.

I could meet you though. I'd be all mumsy. No pressure, lol.

Ellie said...

I have wonky eyes.

When as a kid swimming, the other kids would try to move into my line of sight only to have the really wonky eye move past them. They not only didn't know where to look, but they didn't know where to stand!

Anonymous said...

Seems if you meet in a public place and take a trusted friend who downloaded kung-fu ten minutes prior, then you should be good to go.

But yeah, a little caution never hurt anyone.


The Unbearable Banishment said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
The Unbearable Banishment said...

I feel creepy about asking for a face-to-face. I don't know who wrote the rules or where there written down but I feel the weight of them baring down on me. I'd love to meet people from the ether but am afraid it would all go horribly wrong.

Anonymous said...

All makes sense, the chickening out.
The real danger though is that people are more normal than the character you assign to them.*

*except for the fuckin' mad head-bangers who seem completely normal but turn into stalkers or boob starers or turn up in the sandwich shop just round the corner from work or end up on the same bus or train even though they work miles away. No, not them. You don't ever want to meet up with them.

Please Don't Eat With Your Mouth Open said...

Elaine - Haha, a blog they even exist?! That'd be a bit weird. I have an image of you wondering around the house in a feather boa. How close is this to the truth?

Ellie - Wicked, right - can I just ask, do you see where the eye is looking? So can you ever see straight? I've always wondered. I don't understand how they work.

Sonny - Nah, my friends don't get blogging. That wouldn't happen. They're still in the 'internet is full of weirdos' era, I think.

Unbearable - Haha, I reckon there's a rule book somewhere."You must have commented on 50 of each others blog posts before a casual meet can be arranged"

Bender - Yeah, I suppose. What if someone you had down as being really outgoing and super hot actually turned out to be a bog standard plain Jane? Would you still enjoy reading their blog?

Also, what do you call people at these things? I mean I'd be Jo, obv, but what if your blog name is Mungo Mungo Dog Chops or something?

Kirses said...

it was a bit like reading a book the seeing the film and thinking that the actors playing the characters are totally not what you imagined.

it was interesting, but like you i think i would be better with a smaller group...

i think i'm meeting bluesoup again next thurs, unless that was just drunk twittering :)

i'd be ok with people calling me by my blogname, one of my best friends dads used to call me that when i was 12 anyway.

Scarlett Parrish said...

I have cloven hooves and horns but I don't mind if you blog about those.

Anonymous said...

"Bender - Yeah, I suppose. What if someone you had down as being really outgoing and super hot actually turned out to be a bog standard plain Jane? Would you still enjoy reading their blog?"

Well, as we all know, Plain Janes are always super hot in real life. Additionally, if someone, writes as outgoing and hot then there must be a bit of that inside whether they normally display it in company or not.
Wonky eyes throw me off too. Wonky teeth. Embarrassing hyena and donkey type laughs. You'll never find anyone admitting to those on a blog. They're what you've got to watch out for.

Around My Kitchen Table said...

No one has ever asked to meet me - now I'm feeling like the boy in class who always smelt of wee! But I agree with you. I think I would find it inhibiting.

Anonymous said...

I agree with you. I think I'd only go so that I could have a nose at what other bloggers are like. I'd want to hide myself away and just snoop, and that would be rather rude.

nuttycow said...

Am I the fawn? I wouldn't be offended, honestly.

As you know, I didn't go either. Sort of the same reasons but also because I like to live on the wildside and meet people one on one (if, indeed, I want to meet anyone at all)

jo said...

i know exactly what you mean. there are people that i've gotten to "know" on the blogosphere that frankly i think we would probably get along by sheer virtue of the fact that we have gone through the same stuff and i really do think they seem like cool and great people and all that. but i'm not sure if i could actually meet 'em face to face. i think a large part of being able to be so honest is 'coz i'm hiding from behind the mask of anonymity. no one i know in real life knows i have this particular blog. and i might die if they ever did 'coz if anyone who knew me read it, they would know instantly it was me. that's just too much for me to take.

Please Don't Eat With Your Mouth Open said...

Kirses - Nice analogy, re the book, film thing. Sums it up nicely.

Scarlett - Duly noted.

Bender - You've inspired me to write a post making clear all my bad bits for future reference.

Around - I suppose meeting up is more for people who post on a daily basis and have people actually following their day to day lives. At least, those are the only people I'd be bothered about meeting. Otherwise it's just like meeting any old bob off the street.

Roseski - I felt a bit like that peering through the pub window :D

Nuttycow - You can be the fawn if you want to be the fawn? I see you as more of a four legged beast, with a penchant for black and white splodges.

jo - I hear ya...definitely with you on the anonymous thing. I don't think you realise how much you write under the veil of anonymity until you don't have it any more.

Anonymous said...

It's weird because you think it would be all asking odd questions and 'getting to know' eachother...but it's just more or less general chatter!
It's a shame you couldn't come, it was a very good night indeed!

Huw said...

I didn't go because I am planning to abduct one of you eventually at some stage, so the fewer of you that have seen my face, the better.


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