Sunday, 27 March 2011

I should probably learn to expect the unexpected

It's Saturday afternoon. You're lying on your bed, busy living vicariously through Facebook, when a chat message pops up.

Three hours later you're sitting on a sofa in South London. There's tea, Diet Coke and Jammy Dodgers on the coffee table; a DVD rolling end credits on the television. A slightly dishevelled, blond-haired head has just shifted itself onto your lap. There's an arm curled around your leg.

And you're glancing down at the male form next to you wondering where to put your hands and how exactly this came to be.

In all honesty, it's probably down to you. If you will leave temporary jobs and fire off "goodbye" e-mails to colleagues you have identified as being good looking, urging them to add you on Facebook and keep in shouldn't really come as a surprise when they do. But a lot has happened since that otherwise horrendous temp job in August 2009: namely a round the world trip, a Bastard Ex and a move out of home then back again.

The latter you mention in passing (impossible not to when revealing where you "currently" live), while hoping he doesn't press for the finer details. He doesn't. You're relieved.

It's late, you have a train or three to catch and after some prodding, you manage to coax the tall male form out the door and to the station. You chat on the way, hands in pockets, he apologises for his hungover state. He walks you up to the platform just as the train arrives.

"Thanks for coming over" he says as the doors open.
"Thanks for having me" you reply, stepping up towards the train, "Get to bed!"

And you both lean in. The kiss is short, a peck on the lips this time instead of the cheek. You hop onto the train and take a seat. Leftover chicken bones lie at your feet. Drunk, rioting, marching, boat racing London is on it's way home, and so are you.

Your phone buzzes with a message. You'll reply when safely home, as requested.

And what do you think?

Well, in all honesty, you don't quite know.


Blonde said...


Brennig said...

It sounds delicious to me. I can see it might throw you in to a place of inner turmoil, with everything that's been going on. But I think you should just enjoy and not read too much in to the situation.

Please Don't Eat With Your Mouth Open said...

Blonde - BAFFLING.

Brennig - I have no idea where this has come from. But like you say, I'm not reading anything into it. Whatever "it" is. Is it even an "it"?

Blonde said...

I definitely read it as the start of an it, if you want it to be...

modelofamodernmajorgeneral said...

Be careful with your heart lass.

Enjoy it mind!

Laura Jane Williams said...

I recently alluded to the fact, on my blog, that sex with someone who isn't your ex is one of the worst things about a break up, and must be done as soon as one is sure one won't cry afterward. So I say to you... use this turn of events wisely. Wink, wink.


Please Don't Eat With Your Mouth Open said...

Blonde - Jury's out.

modelofa - Always, on both counts!

Laura - Woah, you're waaaay ahead of me. I couldn't even hold hands right now.

Breeza said...

Don't read too much into it. Think of it as a nice afternoon away from Facebook :)

Ellie said...

Don't think. Enjoy.

f4shion said...

Definatly don't think too much but enjoy as much as possible. I always think each day as it comes in these situations.

Anonymous said...


I wish you well. You deserve to feel good again. :)

Anonymous said...

Do what ever feels best for you Jo. Enjoy it for what it is, one step at a time.

Gin Operated said...

Enjoy yourself and don't think too much!

As modelofa says, take care of your heart. But don't take such good care of it you never share it.

A fling or flirtation could be just what you need right now!

JUST ME said...

A hot, tall blonde man?

It's essential you follow this up.

Please Don't Eat With Your Mouth Open said...

Breeza - Love that suggestion.

Ellie - How can you tell a blogger not to think? That's what we DO!

f4shion - You are speaking da truth.

daniel - I'll have you know I was feeling pretty damn good on my own! Which is half the problem...ho hum.

perp - That's all I can do.

Gin Operated - A fling I could handle. I just get the feeling fling isn't on the cards. Call it instinct (have a good run of luck trusting that one)

JUST ME - Soon come, soon come ;)

Anonymous said...

I'm boring, I know. And you're sensible, I know.

But be careful little Jo.


modelofamodernmajorgeneral said...

more to the point, what's wrong with short, brown haired men?


Please Don't Eat With Your Mouth Open said...

Soupy - Don't worry. I'm waaaay ahead of you :) x

modelofa - Not a jot! I've been out with a few of them in my time too!

modelofamodernmajorgeneral said...

Good good; I suppose now that I'm going grey.... ;)

London-Lass said...

This all sounds effin' marvellous and, at the very least, if nowt happens at least it means that a bit of your mind space is being taken up with this dude instead of `The Unmentionable One' (which can only be for the good).

PS : Ruffled blonde hair is very good on a chap. Well done.


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