Friday, 25 February 2011

A break from the relationship misery (because sometimes, other stuff happens)

On the way home from dinner last night, I had one of those tube moments that makes you go "OH...YES!". I mean, really, is there a better way to finish off a lovely London evening with an old travel buddy than by seeing a horrendously dressed pair of teens clutching a cardboard box? No. There isn't. Vicky Pollard and Rainbow Bright appeared before me and I rubbed my hands together with glee. Oh central line, you spoil me. I took out my camera phone. Aimed it down the carriage. But then...

The box opened.

Girl in the Horrendous Trousers produced a bundle of fur.

It was, on closer inspection... a baby rabbit. A baby rabbit which was totally unphased by the whole beeping, whizzing, rumbling tube business.


Oh, dear reader, how I wanted that rabbit. I wanted it for my very own. Patterned trousers and rainbow hoody long forgotten, all I could see was Baby Rabbit. It sat on Horrendous Trouser Girl's lap all the way until the stop before mine, when it hopped into my arms and said "Save me! Save me! Take me home!" and snuggled into my nook.

That's a lie. It didn't.

Oh, how I wish it did though.

I hated those trousers.

But I loved that rabbit.

10 comments:

Scratch the hostile fay said...

"Horrendous Trouser Girl"

Gawd, you make her sound like a superhero or something.

[looks at picture]

My eyes hurt now, thanks for asking.

Aye,
Scratch

jman said...

And here I thought you were going to comment on the size of her earrings. I expected there to be a trapeze hanging from inside the loop. As for the trousers, maybe she has trouble remembering her alphabet. Glad to see the random funky sights of London along with baby rabbits can penetrate your funk shield. I detect progress!

punctuation said...

You have to read the wording on the trousers in an anti-clockwise direction to decipher the message: "I'm an ugly doris, I'll haunt you in your dreams. I had to wear these trousers coz I'd split the other's seams".

If you scan the pattern on her shoes with a barcode reader it comes up as "Realistic troll; complete with built-in parrot-perch earring accessories and two-tone hair (flammable)".

modelofamodernmajorgeneral said...

What were you expecting to come from the box. Help us non-Londoners. Is this the species know as the shoreditch twat?

P said...

Awwww bless. Vicky Pollard's first bunny!

Breeza said...

Those pants make my eyes hurt!

London-Lass said...

Terrible taste, but cute bun.

(I've been pondering on this for a bit ... but why on earth would you bring a baby rabbit on to the tube?)

soupemes said...

I'd've expected her to pull out a canary to sit on those hooped earrings.

My eyes, my eyes!

Please Don't Eat With Your Mouth Open said...

Scratch - Painful, isn't it? Maybe she was a rabbit-rescuing super hero. You never know.

jman - The huge massive earrings didn't go unnoticed, but the rabbit stole the show for me this time.

punctuation - Wow, where did you become fluent in chav? That's incredible. Do you desipher tattoos with the same degree of accuracy?

model - No, this species is definitely more 'out of London chav' than Shoreditch Twat. You can tell the difference because ST's always wear Raybans and pointy shoes. Trainers aren't their bag. I expected the box to be full of special brew.

P - In fairness, she was very nurturing towards the little scamp.

Breeza - You and me both. Focus on the rabbit, it helps.

Londonlass - I have no idea. I was wondering that myself. Very odd. And it wasn't scared at all, like it does it all the time or something.

soup - I did ponder whether the earrings were stolen from the acrobat's ring at the circus.

Alexia said...

What's a chav doing with something as adorable as a bunny?! Man, I miss London.

 

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