Tuesday, 17 June 2008

I have a mouth ulcer

Yesterday I was idly running my tongue around the inside of my mouth when I came across a tiny little bump. Should have left it really, but instead I decided to try and chew it off in the hope that it would go away.

Not that a little tiny lumpy bit has ever gone away by chewing in the past, but with nothing else better to do, I gave it a whirl.

It didn't go away.

And now I have a mouth ulcer, which, against all good ideas, I am continuing to nibble on. I can't help it, it's just lying there on the inside of my lip, invisible to anyone else but really getting in the way of that normal mouth feeling.

Bonjella is good at times like this, it finally occured to me a few minutes before writing this post to put some on and let the faintly sambucca tasting gel sting / sooth the little lesion away. I then wondered if Bonjella goes off, because I've had this particular tube of the stuff for years, so I checked and yep, sure enough, there is an expiry date.

It's not awfully clear, because in some countries they might write the date differently, or the year may infact be the month (maybe). I'm also not sure what they mean by expired; does it just stop working? Make you ill? Or is it a bit like best before dates where they might not be as great after the time specified, but as long as it's not mouldy, munch away?

And from what writing I can still see on the back, it doesn't say not to use it after the expiry date, it just points you in the direction of it.

October 2005 wasn't that long ago....was it??

And err, random...but whilst looking on wikipedia for hilarious facts about October 2005 to finish off my post with, I came across this little nugget under the entry for the 25th, squeezed between a legal battle and a United Nations investigation:

Ohhh yeah! I remember that!! God, that was huge news. Worldwide business! Remember when thingie dumped whatsit in Oz? Ahhhhh of course!

Maybe I'll edit the October entry too. "In London, England, Jo's Bonjella expired, but she continued to use it anyway. She's still alive."


theperpetualspiral said...

I had some Caesar salad dressing last night that had an expiry date of 2006 and I'm still here, so I'd imagine you're pretty safe with 2005 vintage Bonjella.

If you decide to edit Wikipedia, feel free to add my Caesar salad survival in too :)

Laser Runner said...

My weekend marmalade had a furry coat and once scooped out it was ok. I'm very tempted to make a smutty comment about running my tongue around the inside of your mouth to check the progress of the ulcer but I won't as it is not appropriate and very childish

surviving myself said...

I actually read about your Bonjella incident in the Times today.

blueskies2day said...

Wow... do you reckon the guy who wrote that on Wikipedia thought the girl would see it and take him back?

James said...

Mmmmm I love the taste of Bonjella. I have a tube which has been kicking around for sometime, but it isn't looking as old an tired as yours.

If posts suddenly dry up on this blog I might check to see if it has an expiry date too.

cynicalscribble said...

As well as applying lashings of bonjella I burn my mouth ulcers with my food. It's not clever, it's not wise and I'm sure it creates more pain for me than it heals.

But fighting back, with a hot roasted spud, makes me feel a bit better against the little blighter for daring to invade my mouth.

arbyn said...

I love Wikipedia.

RustedWire said...

Give us a break. That was probably the biggest news story to happen her in Australia in the entirety of 2005. And possibly 2004.

Our news headlines always start with, 'Today, two people fell of their bicycles and got back up and kept riding.' Otherwise they talk about the rest of the world.

Robbie said...

I get mouth ulcers far too much for my liking and now I'm completely off Bonjella because I'm a Man.
Although I wouldn't use that Bonjella if I was you as it loks like someone has tried to apply the actually tube to their mouth to see what happens.

London-Lass said...

I've got a mouth ulcer too. I cant use Bonjela - the taste of the stuff turns my stomach - so I swill Diet Coke against the mouth ulcer instead. I kid myself that the acid in the drink will kill the ulcer - it sure numbs it anyway.

Please Don't Eat With Your Mouth Open said...

perpetual - Do you know that Bonjella doesn't have a wiki page yet? Are you thinking what I'm thinking? Oh yeah...

laser - I used some pesto yesterday and it wasn't until afterwards that I realised the jar was moudly round the top. Still tasted good though. Is that wrong?

survivng - It's almost as big news as me tidying my room this morning, stop the press!

blueskies - that's what i wondered, it just seemed a reaeaaallly random thing to be in there.

james - hunt it down and share the date. I can add it to my new bonjella wikipedia page.

cynical - oh yes me too! Once I put salt on an ulcer because someone told me it would get rid of it. It just hurt a lot, but it's kind of a satisfying 'i'm doing something productive' pain. Like squeezing a spot.

arbyn - Wikipedia knows ALL!

rusted - bahahaha. Love it. Having been to Perth, I can imagine there not being an awful lot to complain about.

robbie - I dunno, it still tastes ok, it stings a little bit more - maybe the ingredients get more potent?

londonlass - oooh try a bit of salt! or failing that, ice. It doesn't get rid of it, but you can pretend it does. Coke's a new one...

Rol said...

I'm convinced that expiry dates are only there to make us buy new stuff even when the old stuff isn't done.

Laser Runner said...

Umm "Squeezing a spot" - one of my guilty pleasures when I was a teenager


Blog Template by YummyLolly.com - RSS icons by ComingUpForAir