Tuesday, 25 September 2007

The search is on

You may notice I'm being rather attentive to the blogging thing lately, this comes as a result of being unemployed and sat around at home "looking for a job". Actually, that's a lie. My parents are being cool as they know I've been working on my MA dissertation all summer, so in a way it's a mini-holiday I'm having at the moment.

Saying that, my CV's completed, I've sent it to an agency I used to work for a couple of years back to see if they can help me out on the permanent job front and to a well known publishing house for a general application or something. I'm not too sure what that was about in all honesty...I had a couple of glasses of wine with dinner last night, came upstairs, wrote a covering letter and sent it. Plus have a feeling I used the word "sphere" which can never be a good thing. Never mind.

Leaving university after four years has made me realise that I can't stand people asking me 'sooo, what's next?', to the extent where I banned the question from our house a couple of weeks ago. How frustrating is it when everyone who walks through the door wants to hunt down the latest postgraduate student and ask what she wants to do for the rest of her life when in reality, I don't know. All I know is I want to write or do something involving me putting my opinions to good use; but I don't know where to start, I don't know how to go about it and I don't want to go back to being a PA or secretary, a job I've done nearly every summer in big companies since I was 17.

"Oh but they're just interested" squeals my mum when one of her friends makes small talk with me about my future.

I think not. There's no 'innocent interest' about it when it comes to parent's friends, especially when those friends have sons or daughters of their own, who, recently graduated, are all pouring into the job search pond alongside me. They're just itching to find out what I'll end up doing so they can rate the success of their own child. How do I know? Because my mum does it about her friend's kids. "oooh, D&J banged on for ages about how clever their son was, but he's only just got a job and he graduated a year ago! I don't think it's a very good one either..!"

I suppose I feel a bit deflated. It's difficult when you're just one of many and all I seem to read are comments with a distinctly negative edge about the fate of aspiring English graduates, the most recent found on a dip into Belle De Jour's blog...

9. At university, I studied a wholly academic humanities subject useless to the
world at large. Given the choice of prostitution, temping or copywriting - the
occupations in London which seem to be constantly hiring - I opted for this.
Eventually.

The 'this' she speaks of, as you probably know given that her blog's about to be serialised on TV, is that of a call girl. Fear not, I'm not about to get my baps and flaps out for the punters just yet, but it just made me think 'great, that's made me feel a load better'. Then again, her statement's maybe a little ironic seeing as her degree probably gave her the skills to write well, which has since given her several book deals and a TV adaptation. The royalties can't be all that bad...

So yeah. Bit of a more self-pitying personal rant this one and an invitation to stay tuned and follow my budding career as a..well...whatever I end up doing or not doing. Think car crash TV, but on a blog. Mmmmm.

Yours,

Subdued, Unencouraged and Unhopeful, NW London.

4 comments:

London-Lass said...

I wonder perhaps if this gloom is more to do with finding your life suddenly all calm following all the hub-bub of getting things done in time (dissertations, yadda ya di ya) amongst the general rushing around caused your studies, than really anything else. As opposed to feeling depressed about the future I think you should be feeling jolly proud of what you've achieved. Like you say, Belle de Jour (or whatever the ruddy hell her name was/is) wouldnt've got famous on just the contents of her knickers ... And, remember, moments of worry/self-doubt like this are good (no really it is) .. you know what they say about `fools rushing in' and all that .. take your time, you've got talent and intelligence on your side .. the future mayappear a little uncertain right now but this is good .. this means you can shape it to what you want.

I'm now off to change my sanitary towel.

James said...

Whatever you do don't sign up to all those graduate websites that send you job emails. While it may be useful for finding a job, a few years down the line you'll still be deluged by the things.

I still get loads sent through, and the unsubscribe process is so difficult, especially when you've forgotten both your usernames and passwords, it's just easier to delete the mails. Oh the joys of being regularly reminded of all the wonderful careers that you could of choose when you left uni, instead of the pitiful one you fell into.

Beverley said...

I was just reading in your post about "Belle de Jour" then saw your previous post "I've been a bad girl" and put two and two together...but you haven't been that bad have you lol

It must be a bit of a stress at the moment. Glad I am too old for all of that. My advice (for what's worth)is just get any job for know and keep applying for better things. Anyway, you don't know what will happen with the rubbish job. I know someone who when he graduated became a swimming pool attendant and now is the manager of a leisure centre....

Jo said...

london lass - yeah I think it has been a bit of a weird time. Like for the first time ever I've got nothing concrete ahead, no university, no work to do, no job, it's a bit disconcerting when I'm used to being busy. It's also weird because even Miss Pink who neverrrrrr got a job now has a job. Thanks for the advice though it's made me feel better!

James - Ohh been there, done that. I'm never signing up to those websites again...they're so annoying. One summer I signed up to a whole load and they kept emailing me even though the dates I'd put for availability were up. I'm just sending it straight to companies rather than going through "fish4jobs" etc.

Beverley - Yeah I'll probably end up getting a job via my mum's contacts soon if I can't find something else it's not what I want to do but I need money more than a career at the moment! And no, I haven't been doing anything too naughty, just a wrong turn here and there. ;)

 

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