Monday, 21 May 2007

Shun the Virgins....SHHUUNNNNNNNN

First of all, to get it out of the way - Desperate Virgins on Channel 4 last night???? Who was the self-confessed 22year old 'sex guru' or whatever who was called in to help Nervous, 29,Virgin Bloke - he looked like a right gimpo, all he did was just made the bloke watch porn and then took him to a club and go 'Dude! Why aren't you talking to the girls? Quick! Some have just walked in now! Go and say Hi!' and sent this guy with next to no confidence across this bar to talk to the group of girls standing there all looking at him like 'Do I come here often? Err, yes'. Criinnnnge.

Second of all, both of them have pretty much stunted their sexual prowess any further by appearing on that show...can you imagine Nervous, 29 and Gimpo the Sex Guru approaching you in a club and laying on the sweet talk? Eurrrrgh, what a minger. What a rankus pair. Gimpo the Sex Guru reminded me of this rancid bloke in a club I'm in at uni, we call him 'Itch-cock and he claims he's slept with about 100 women. Nuff said.

And as for Disabled Virgin Bloke, aside from all the cringey 'I just want a hug, come here hired glamour model whose in my house for me to "photograph"...' stuff, what I couldn't stop wondering was how he got disabled from glandular fever. Does this happen? Semi-hypochondriac here, help me out.

OH YEAH...and did anyone else think it was a bit odd that Christian Virgin chose to lose it in her sister's bed?

The conclusion: Bloody hell, those escort boys and girls deserve every penny of the £100 an hour they charge; losing someones virginity would clearly be more traumatic for them than for the actual Virgins. Fact.

And on that note, I'm off to get rid of some essays.


the boy who likes to... said...

Sounds like I missed a good show.
Guess this means I wouldnt be able to tell if I was being hit on by "Gimpo the Sex Guru."
I don't know if this is a good thing of bad?

Jo said...
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Drama Queen said...

Sometimes I so don't miss UK tv.

China Blue said...

I forgot there was a series dedicated to virgins - it was all about the 2-pant-wearing, electric-shock-dancing Ralph Feinnes lookalike last week losing his cherry. If these men suffer from social anxiety, how do they think that parading that on TV will make them look any less pathetic?

LOL @ 'Gimpo the Sex Guru'!

Jo said...
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Miss Understood said...

Oh God, I can't believe I missed it. From what you wrote, and the way you wrote it, (bloody hilarious!) it seems I really need to tune in next week.
It is on next week, right?

Jo said...
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